A Mother's Day Tribute

A few months ago, a heard from a friend that her mother had died. This of course, made me very sad for her. She mentioned that she was writing her mother's obituary. Immediately I thought, *Would my mom know exactly how I felt about her if she died today?* I knew I didn't want to wait until she was gone to tell the world who she was. Now, I know this might sound a bit morbid. I'm not in any way thinking that my mother might pass away soon!! She is the picture of health and vibrance. It just made me think. And I'm not so good at telling people to their face what I actually think (I need to get better at that) unless it's my children. So I thought I'd tell her here. Then I could share with everyone else as well just who she is to me!

Let me just say first of all that I feel like the most blessed woman in the world to be able to call Jane Shepley "Mama." She is the epitome of everything a mother should be. She is kind and loving and wise. She makes her home a place where people naturally want to be. She is gracious and elegant--as every Southern lady should be. That is something that I am still trying to learn from her! When I talk about my Mama to people, I know they can see just how much I love her, just how amazing she is and what an impact she's made in my life.

My mama and I are really not a lot alike from the outside. Her home is the most pristinely beautiful and "white glove" clean place you've ever seen. If you've ever been in my home--you KNOW that's not the case here! :) Sure, I could blame it on six kids, and at this point in my life that's probably a lot of it. But even before we had any kids I struggled to keep up with house work. She's also very organized. Every part of her life is put together--from the physical stuff in her home to her schedules and thoughts. Once again, not me! Don't get me wrong--I'm okay with this stuff. Really! I've come to accept that while my mom keeps a perfectly clean and organized home, I don't know that she could have handled six kids. Or she may have gone insane trying!! :) I think she knows this as well so I'm not telling her anything new! She doesn't deal too well with chaos, whereas I seem to thrive on it sometimes!

But this brings me to another amazing aspect of my mama. She has always encouraged me to be who I am. She calls me her "free spirit." She gives me the blessing to pursue my passions even though they aren't the things that she would necessarily do or the same things she did when we were growing up. I've never felt like I had to walk in her shoes (although I would be proud to!) She has embraced my decisions of homeschooling, extended breastfeeding, baby wearing, etc. She's even embraced my decision to give birth at home--although the first time she admits she was a complete wreck. I never knew it. And afterward she told me she thought it was the greatest way to give birth! She validates me.

She loves me with an unconditional mother's love. Really. I know sometimes she rolls her eyes (on the inside of course) at things I do or decisions I make. But she loves me and she supports me. What else could I ask for?

One of the most important things my mama ever gave me for my own future happiness is to be a beautiful role of a submissive, loving wife. I always knew my daddy was in charge. And my mama is a "take charge" kind of person for sure! But I knew he had the last say. She has served him and kept her mouth shut at times when I don't know that I would have. But she has shown me what makes a happy marriage for 40+ years. For that I am forever grateful. When so many of my friends have had issues with the word "submission" through the years, I never have. To me it's a beautiful picture of release. I don't have to be in control. I'm not the one who will answer for our family. She taught me that.

And the most important thing that she (and my daddy) gave me was a love for Jesus--a desire to have a family that glorifies Jesus. I have thanked God over and over that I grew up in a home that put Jesus first. No, we weren't perfect. But I always knew that Jesus was center stage. They took me to a church where I regularly heard the Word of God preached and saw my daddy serve as an elder. I saw my mama giving her heart to the Covenant children in our church (and she still does!!) She has served and loved God's family and her own family. When her own mother was dying, she sacrificed to go and stay with her week after week. I'm sure she fretted over leaving us all that time, but you know what? I don't even remember it!! I don't know that I would even know to what extent she was gone if we hadn't had conversations about it since I was an adult. That speaks volumes. She could be gone to love and take care of her own mother that long, and yet I wasn't emotionally affected because of the security I knew in my own parents.

Mama is still teaching me. She has served the children of their church for decades, but now she also loves and mentors young women who are starting their own families. I know how much they love her, and they have every reason to! She's amazing!

And I certainly would be remiss if I didn't mention the grandmother that she is to my children. She is one amazing Mimi. She teaches them--even better than she taught me--about the love of Jesus. I will be forever grateful for her (and for my mother-in-law who has this heart for them as well.)

Yes, I have been blessed. I have an amazing mama who would give anything in the world for me and my kids. And of course following suit here in my differences from her, she did not receive her Mother's Day card in the mail today (I got mine yesterday from her.) She will get hers on Monday, and she'll probably be thankful for the fact that I got it in the mail at all!! Because that's just who she is!

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, and mostly Happy Mother's Day to the woman who gave me life and has blessed my life beyond measure and has helped to mold and shape me into who I am today.

I love you, Mama!!